Why Am I Feeling So Much Fear?

I take the front seat on roller coasters.  I quit jobs when they get boring.  I eat sea urchin and raw oysters.  I put my thoughts out there on this blog and other places.

I’m not one who is afraid to take risks. I give talks about courage and fear.    If I do all of these things, why is it that there are days when Unknown-1fear seems to come over me like a wave?

It’s not the kind of fear that  was so deadly that it would stop me from doing anything.  It’s different now.

The fear that I experience now is like low level anxiety.  It’s the kind of fear that is like fat in blood vessels.  The blood still gets through but it doesn’t flow perfectly.

I, who talk about courage,  shouldn’t feel any fear, right?  That’s what I had been thinking.

After  trying to figure out where the fear comes from, I recognize that this fear is trying to teach me something. I’m doing a lot of things now for the first time.   Now I know that it’s natural to feel this fear.  It shows that I am doing some stuff I’ve never done before. This fear is actually a good thing. It shows that I am trying some new things.  It’s fear that doesn’t stop me.

In my talks about fear, I often  say, “shake hands with your fear.”  And that’s what I’ve been doing as this low-level fear comes to me.  I’ve not been judging myself, I’ve been acknowledging my fear and shaking hands, saying :  “Hi fear, I know you’re there, but I am still going to take action. Thanks for coming my way and pointing out that I’m trying new stuff”

Roppongi Breakfastjpeg.014On those days, when I judged myself and told myself:  “you speak on courage, you shouldn’t be feeling fear,” I blocked myself from figuring things out, and held myself back from taking action.

It feels good to make friends with fear.  The fear can be like  a good friend who gives you helpful feedback.

On those days when you feel fear, be kind to yourself, resist the judgment, welcome the fear like someone who is there to help you to learn about yourself and acknowledge that you are trying something new.

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  1. Sherilyn says:

    I love your attitude Bob! Some trolls already bashed my first HuffPost article and I was, to be honest, afraid to write again. I know I have some good things to say and I know I can’t please everybody so f the trolls. I’m going to write!